Ignorant Twats That Keeping Asking For Hosting Recommendations

Oh. My. Days.

The resources required for hosting websites come from a large and complex pool of computer processes. If you want something that works well for you, then you need to pay for the skills and resources to set it up for you. If you want some cheap shit that probably works for most people most of the time, then any old crap will do.

If you’ve chosen a host for your website because it comes cheap from a large company – then like shopping at a supermarket, you’ve chosen the ‘value’ range. Don’t be surprised if it comes with surprise horse meat. So when you chose your cheap host, stop fucking crying when your site is slow and gets hacked. These large companies work in bulk. You are a tiny, tiny percentage of their business and they are looking to maximise their profits. For every one of you, there are thousands who just happen not to have had a problem. So by all means change to a different one. This time, for a while, you might be OK. But it really is just pot luck.

There are many technical layers to hosting and serving up a web site. You’re reading this because you have no fucking idea what the complexities are. You are being duped. Do you really think that you’re getting some amazing deal? They’re just hoping that you’re too thick to spot what the catch is. And trust me, there is a catch, and the catch is that you’re getting shit hosting.

Just shut your big wanky cake hole and pay for proper hosting. Find someone who will build you a service that fits your needs. And if you can’t afford it, well then stop crying too. Tough tits. If you won’t pay it, then you really are the smelliest of turds.

Finding a good host is easy. You just don’t want to admit it, or pay for it.

Seriously, hop around between those crappy hosts (and yes you know exactly which they are), whine and moan. Keep going back to forums and mailing lists and ask “which is better?”. It’ll fill some little pointless hole in your life.

In the mean time, businesses that value their customer’s sensitive data will pay good money for proper hosting. Leaving you with your site down. Again.